One: Name a character and I'll give you three or more "facts" from my personal fanon about that character. If it isn't a fandom I know anything about, I'll make something up.
Two: If you had me under your command and could make me write anything, regardless of whether or not I know the fandom or if anybody even writes fic in that fandom and no matter how crack-addled it might be, what would you love to see me write?